Dear Sir Dennis (Part I)

I’m surprised some of my beloved students actually send me some messages, mostly queries of some sort. Many were really cute I was smiling all the time as I replied to each and every one of them- dutifully and sincerely…

To the others, you are most welcome to send whatever your hearts are screaming to ask from me. I shall answer them to the best I could. Many thanks!

From @goodolstudent

Dear Sir Dennis,

Why did you become a teacher? I always sit in your class, listening to all the crap you say and wonder… “Man, what went wrong in the cosmic order?” Many times, I was tempted to just shoot you with a gun while in the middle of your so-called “lectures” which I call garbage by the way. Thing is, I’m not licensed to own a gun yet. Please elucidate me on this matter. Many thanks.

To @goodolstudent:

Thank you for that audacious and honest perception towards me. You see, I was prepped to be a powerful political scion… the Chosen One who will resolve all nuclear wars, world hunger, and Justin Bieber mass hysteria that is, until my mentor decided that I choose a higher calling- which is according to him, evince my political prowess to the young… as part of his prophetic claims that the youth shall one day rule the land and given the proper mindset, will rule it with justice and competence. I have never understood him- to deny my destiny for the sake of some pathetic pubescent mammals which were supposed to be my loyal subjects one day… and to actually mingle with them in some hideous enclosure called a classroom!!??? Nevertheless, my mentor was never wrong and I, though half-heartedly, followed his oracle.

P.S. Once I discover who you really are, I will make sure you experience all hell this world has to offer, you wretched low-life mongrel. See you in class!

Love,

Sir Dennis

From @girlinterrupted12

Dear Sir Dennis,

All my life, I have been misunderstood. It seems nobody cares for me… nobody can see the real me- anguishing, and crying for help deep inside. Please help me.

To @girlinterrupted12:

Don’t be a wuss. All people have issues in life. Instead of whining and blaming everything for your disgusting perceptions, join my debate club so that we can expertly rebut your unbelievably imbecilic arguments, demolishing you to the ground and crushing whatever self-dignity you have left. Believe me, not only will it open your eyes to the reality but will also widen your take on things— that life is unfair, woman. Deal with it and make the best out of it.

I hope I have provided some warmth, comfort and encouragement to your fragile soul. No need to thank me. It’s my job anyway.

Love,

Sir Dennis

From @irritatedstyoodent

Dear Sir Dennis,

Why do you act like you know it all? Seriously. You sound more Hitler than teacher.

To @irritatedstyoodent:

Did you smack your little head on the wall or something? It’s because I am a more advanced life form than you are, silly. Did you forget you just recently evolved to a multicellular organism (a big leap from your cousins prokaryote and fungus)??? Well, I guess that is the effect of having recently growing an organ named brain in your cephalic region.

Love,

Sir Dennis

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30 Comments

Filed under kids, school, teachers

30 responses to “Dear Sir Dennis (Part I)

  1. besobeso

    woah. those questions would annoy ANYONE…

  2. Just put your questions in here my dear students and I shall answer them to the best I can in the next issue. Toodles!

  3. notadamselindistress

    “Join my debate club so that we can expertly rebut your unbelievably imbecilic arguments, demolishing you to the ground and crushing whatever self-dignity you have left.”

    Sir, advertising?

  4. yourdeareststudent

    Dear Sir Dennis,
    Just wondering, what brand of foundation do you use? =______= BTW, you need to lessen the make up. (powder or foundation or whatever)

  5. Carl

    I can’t believe I’m still breathing from all the laughter xDD Nice one sir :)) Here’s a question I’ve been meaning to ask you, sir: If you could be anyone, and I mean ANYONE at all on the face of this planet, who would you be? (And please refrain from referring to yourself even though you already know how awesome you are) 😀

  6. FinntheHuman

    Dear Sir Dennis:

    According to my understanding of your blog posts, I came to the conclusion that you view the generation following yours is generally inferior, that without your heroic acts of shunning the world of mediocrity in terms of intelligence, there is zero to no chance for humanity to ever prosper.

    “These kids are arrogant. They are self-centered. They are drama queens. They are cynicism-breathing dragons and they will eat you alive if you do not know how to defend yourself.”

    Now the question is this: what hope does humanity have when the fate of the world is handed to the next generation? Will heightened narcissism prevail to be victorious in the midst of the pandemonium and entropy, or will the world fall into deeper chaos, spiraling out of control, losing ourselves in our own insanity as we chew on your perfectly manicured nails as you say “I told you so”?

    oh and by the way, Cool Blog :DD

    • Thanks for taking the time to read… and putting your two cent’s worth… =)

      Generations come and go… with each having an identity- a tag which they shall be remembered for. There is no denying that today’s generation is characterized by unimaginable doses of self-importance and lack of restraint. But like I said, that is just how they are. I admit to deigning at some of their antics (conflict of values most probably) but to label them condescendingly and us imperiously is out of the question.

      Each generation falls short at some aspects… but they are equipped with an impetus that is supposed to perpetuate, propagate, and propel the society, until another generation inherits the land. Evolution after all, dictates that the human race should continuously improve.

      My point being; it is not a matter of who’s the better generation, because no one is. Maybe, this blog is just a reminder about some things that never get out of style… and some things which will always be the better choice.

      Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. =)

  7. Hahaha… Those are some crazy questions and fun answers! Are they really from your student? Thanks for the good laugh though 🙂

  8. lya

    Dear Sir Dennis,

    Why bother with Jessica Zafra’s works when you can make a more scholarly analyses of the poetic and not-so-poetic exchanges in this blog. Think about it…must be the reason your oral.p was canceled yest.

  9. yourcowardlystudent

    Hahaha! I cannot get over how hilarious this post is. x)

    Dear Sir Dennis,

    This has been a question that’s been on my mind lately, and I hope it doesn’t offend you.
    Are you gay? Or are you just metrosexual and narcissistic? Please do enlighten me with your answer on this one.

    I will be awaiting the next issue!

  10. yocrazyassstudentyolo

    Dear Sir Dennis,

    I’ve been tuning in to your blog lately and I’m honestly jealous of your vocabulary (yes sadly). How can a student like me have such a wide and deep vocab as yours?

    And yes would you ever generalize something positive about students of this society since I’ve been lately reading your posts and I really wanted to know if you have something good to say about them for once.

    Confession: Some of your outfits are really disturbing while in class.

  11. teampeeniss

    Okay, lay all your cards on the table, no holds barred. Name your top 3 favorite third years and your top 3 hatest third years. That is, if you’re up to the challenge. And why.

  12. I was rolling on my bed laughing literally :]

  13. some of the questions are kind of…rude and stupid, though
    nevertheless, i like how you handle them sir, by dazzling them with your wits
    cool post \m/

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